Friday, August 16, 2013

All about You...


"I'm coming back to the heart of worship, And it's all about You..."



Yesterday was the last day of the mission with Rahab's Rope, in Goa, and my last full day in India. So after almost 10 weeks with Oasis, in Mumbai and Bangalore, and 2 weeks with Rahab's Rope in Goa, my trip is coming to an end and I was given chance to reflect on what God has been teaching me. One of the questions in our group debrief was, 'what is the main thing that God has taught you during this trip?’ That is a challenging question. He has been so tangibly close to me in my whole time here and I have countless examples of His grace, mercy and faithfulness. He has taught me so much about His character, and mine, and I am excited about what the future might look like now that this experience is being woven into it.

But, what is the main thing He has taught me? As I often do in those situations I began frantically trying to rehearse an answer that would sound good, witty or very spiritual (yes, I do that) but then I stopped. I literally laid down and waited for God to bring something to mind. I should do this more often because it was pretty incredible. He just reminded me of a thought I had begun last Sunday, but stopped because it was a bit scary...

We were in church and the band were playing 'Heart of Worship'. I love that song.



Yes, I could definitely resonate with this. I sang along, feeling content that my being in India was 'all about You, Jesus'. I've been here living out the gospel, right? Good news to the poor? Release for the captives? Setting the prisoner free? Yep, it was all there.

 I was only a week away from going home and I realized that I'd missed the point somewhere along the way. It wasn't 'all about You, Jesus' was it? I'd made it all about so many other things...

"I'm sorry Lord for the thing I've made it
. When it's all about You"



I'd made it about things that may seem good, and right even.
 I'd made it about the women, and about the children. About those who were still living in brothels and being systematically raped every day. 
 About those who have been abandoned in orphanages that don't meet their needs. About women who eek out a living during the monsoon seasons when nobody comes to her shop.

I'd made it about me, about how I could change the world, how I could rescue them and how I could tell others about what I've done.

 And yes, I was doing this for God. I was doing all of this because I fully believe this is what following Jesus looks like; this is radical discipleship. I'd forgotten that this is all about Him. That this is only about Him. It is Jesus who rescues, heals, redeems, frees and loves. I am blessed that He has chosen to share His work with me but it really is His work, not mine.

 I had made an idol of the ministry and the women and children (even of the pimps and the madams), and that is my biggest lesson on this trip.



Yes, I have learned enormous amounts about prevention, intervention and aftercare in human trafficking. 
Yes, I have learned about the faithfulness, grace and mercy of God. 
Yes, I have learned about life in India and the atrocities of the commercial sex trade here. 
Yes, I have seen, heard and experienced things I will never forget.

The bottom line is that this is ALL about Jesus. It is not about me. It is not about India. It is not even really about human trafficking.

 This trip has been an out-working of worship; a response to God's love for me and my understanding of His love for the world. Worship. And that needs to begin with the realization that it is Jesus who changes the world, not me.

Blessings,
G - India Volunteer

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